I Hate Patterened Underwhere

Sluts!  Smokers!  No one is safe from my youthful self-righteousness.  This time the target of concern is our beloved housekeeper Peggy, who smoked cigarettes, which I had been taught were VERY BAD and a GATEWAY DRUG and STINKY etc etc.  (We actually had an all school assembly one time with Christopher Nance, who was the local weather guy (double parenthetical - omg I just googled him and found out he was fired in 2002 for "menacing and profane off-air behavior"  !!!???  wtf that is so crazy), anyway he came and spoke to us in the gym and I vividly remember he said he would rather "lick a rat than kiss a smoker."  This image stuck with me forever and when I finally kissed a smoker as a young adult I thought "this is really not so bad and actually kind of hot" so yeah, drug deterrent fail SMES.)

Stay tuned for next time, when you'll learn what kind of "underwhere" I preferred as a 9 year old.